Trog

There is movement all about me, forms I can’t discern, floating in my dreams
There are shadows on the cavern walls, wavering in chaotic streams

Questions scrape my bones like hungry wraiths, solutions never see the light of day
Bundle up the answers, bind them like sheaves of straw, set to fire in the night

The furies rise from the ash beds, there is no phoenix, no morning sun

Bury seeds in the cold-field, bits of knowledge, pushed into the wet earth
Fragile little plantlings hungry for life, set their roots and stretch out for the light

Heedless of the storm descending, turn to face the darkened horizon, resisting
As dreams fall like stars from the sky, the harvest rots while and fields are set on fire

There is phoenix rising, only the furies fly from the ash beds, their swarm blots the sun

We heard the promise and followed its call, we stood beneath the open sky
To bask in the solar wind, blind as the troglodyte emerging from the cave

Futility

A taut steel cable
Stretched across the void, my grip
Is precarious

Tensions mounting as
The ravaged flesh of fingers
Torn inflexible

My agonized limbs
Like Tantalus in Tartarus
Hung like rotting meat

Rent, worn out, and torn
Separate from their sockets
Elongated pain

The abysmal maw
Opens in the dark, fetid
Breath like sulfur blows

The weight of silence
Crushed like wise old Sisyphus
Pushing up the hill

Observation – March 5th, 2020, Thursday

It is 5:27 in the morning

Kitty is yowling for attention

She is unhappy with the food in her dish

She wants something different

Something fresh

She doesn’t want the supplement I give her

To strengthen her joints, and her back legs

She is seventeen and getting arthritic

She wants to play

She cannot jump anymore

She does not like to play string

While laying on the floor

I lift her to the window

So she can watch the dark street

Dissolution

Dissolute, spinning
I am flirting with non-being
De-constructing, me

A trillion gaps
In my integrity, gaps
Ever widening

Leave me wondering
Am I really-real, how do
My atoms cohere?

The substance of self
A mass of tissue, fluids
Churning in the brine

Electrical nodes
Seeing and thinking, feeling
Being a construct

I am cognizant
Perceiving and resolving
The riddle of me

Burned

I stood on the edge of a great mountain
I bathed in streams of snowmelt, cold and clear
My lungs like a bellows, pumping my heart
I lived in a world of little oxygen
I contemplated deep philosophies
There were no mysteries to challenge me
I spoke to God, and god spoke back to me
The divine word, resounding in the light
I looked down on the people with despair
I despised them, the unworthy masses

I cut my leg on a sharp stone, and fell
A pathogen set in, and I grew ill
My wound became discolored, infected
It crawled up my veins in jagged red streaks
I needed antibiotics. doctors
Despite my constitution, I would die
I was afraid for my life, mortified
By the ease with which I was struck down
I lost the mastery of my ego
My self-satisfaction turned to loathing

I was afraid, now, of death and darkness
Fever and pneumonia nearly took me
My powerful lungs, turned to feeble sacks
My muscles became flaccid, I was lost
I lived in a wheelchair, I could not work
I had no skills, I became dependent
I stewed in contempt, bewailing my fate
My lost holiness, my former station
I waited for the god I once walked with
To lift me from this world, to transform me

I became obsequious and grateful
For the few coins that were dropped in my cup
For the small sum of funds given to me
Deposited each month in my mailbox
I discovered the vice of alcohol
I measured a new form of endurance
How many days and nights could I stay drunk
I lost the bet, and died in an alley
I fell from my wheelchair with the garbage
Face down in my filth and my excrement

My spirit rose, lifting from the valley
I saw my mountain tall and forbidding
I cringed as I ascended, fearing God
Soiled as I was, and miserable
Broken as I was, unwashed, unshriven
I rose past the cold peak of my mountain
Rising higher than I had ever dreamed
The bright sun touched me with its tongues of fire
I was burned…burned alive, I was burned clean
By the brilliance of the spirit, love

Saint Valentine’s Day

Jennifer is she
Bright as a morning in May
Sensual and sweet

A light in the dark
My warming breeze in winter
February’s love

Freckles, and green eyes
Her flashing smile lights my heart
As the sun in spring

Clear as the bright stream
Swift as the rising moon, cool
In the evening

She listens to me
Sheltering my hopes, and dreams
Believing in me

She is strong, and fierce
I lean on her when I’m tired
And she carries me

Six years of loving
Kind and caring Valentine
Jennifer is she

Warning

The meadow stretches into green lawns before high walls, where children run
Jet engines roaring, fly, the chariots of War, bristling with missiles

Question everything, consider the children, forced to march in columns
War poisons the mind, justifies violence, and ruins the spirit

War robs the people of justice, turning its victims into heroes
Sip from the sour milk, throw stones at your oppressors, force arms on the poor

We stand and we fall, a society of pawns, ignorant and true
Trumpets blare, the faithful gather stones, to hurl them at the enemy

The ageless charade, sustenance from pain, succor from violence, shame
There can be no peace in a heart filled with vengeance, resentments linger

It will never end, all victories are hollow, the wheel keeps turning
The meadow stretches into green lawns before high walls, where children run

In a better world, playgrounds would not need fences, children would compete
In games as friends, they would not throw rocks at soldiers, in a better world

Our wealth should be used to educate, care for the elderly, not war
Missiles in space, to feed our fears, the hungry ghosts of nuclear war

We are one family orbiting this blue world beneath our yellow sun
Lies do not nourish, we must not cling to them, the enemy is us

Peace comes from peace, not war, and goodwill from goodwill, we must aim for these
Set aside our greed, fear and hatred, love one another, you and me

We are one big family